Have you ever heard a song that makes your hips move or a sexy memory that floods your mind and takes you to a place of just wanting to have sex? Not like the hey let’s have sex, but they rip your clothes off and throw you across the room kind of sex? When you can picture laying your partner on their back, slowly undressing them, kissing every inch of their sexy body - making you hard or wet at the mere thought of seducing them. Maybe you have not felt that cock inside you or that wet pussy tightening on you for a couple days. The music beats and you can feel their hands gripping your hair or holding your hips, the memory has you shifting your legs – whatever it is, feel it and then do something fun about it.
You’re in this moment - you can feel their touch and the need for your partner becomes stronger.. you’re ready... The passion, the kiss, the touch, the desire. Can you feel yourself shifting? Your clit throbbing and cock moving? Go ahead, grab your partner or you love toy - feel the rush of the blood flow as you take your mind to that very place of pleasure. What happens next? Is she looking up in your eyes as she takes your cock in her mouth? Is he laying you down kissing your inner thighs while pulling your hips into him?
Your mind is the most powerful possession we have. In a few short sentences and with words that are sinful - you’re aching for something more. So pleasure yourself - stop reading. Let the moment take you to your own ecstasy. Come back when you are done.
You have heard the expression mind over matter - this is no different with your sexuality. Our rules of society and daily tasks hinder us from exploring the very situations that can bring us pleasure. Our minds are clogged with daily chores and day to day tasks - we know we need to eat, sleep, work, pay bills and continue on the race before bedtime. This sends a trigger to our brain that whatever triggers our sexuality and the desires within us should be last on the priority list. So we neglect the moment - we brush it off, we refuse to feed the burning within. By doing this - we are doing a disservice to our sexual enjoyment.
The same practice that keeps our existence, is the same practice that becomes hidden and shameful for many when it comes to giving into those sexual temptations. When it comes to exploring different techniques of positions, touching, multiple orgasms, withholding orgasms to being told when to cum - this all has one common denominator, your mind. So why do we push away those naughty thoughts? Why do we not indulge in our sexual fantasies like we would a chocolate cake?
There is something about being able to please your partner in such a way that leaves you both breathless. I hear often that men are intimidated by anal play. This magical “no no” hole that somehow will change their world and existence in a negative light is just close-minded thinking. Yes.. Why Yes, it will change you the first time that your prostate is massaged and your balls are being licked while you have the soft hands stroking your manhood. Your mind is what controls the ability to explore a new area or continue to shut it off. Remember that disservice in the beginning of this? According to tantra- where you connect your mind with your body and soul to become more in-tune with your bodies pleasure. Sex feels great, it should anyhow (if it doesn’t, please reach out to a medical professional – you would not ignore if you had pain anywhere else that kept you from doing daily activities, so treat any pain with sex the same). Somraj Pokras is the author of Male Multiple Orgasm, a great read and guide on how to engage in areas that where once taboo to bring you to a different state of mind to enjoy a different kind of pleasure. This isn’ just about benefiting the men out there – this is about opening up and learning those techniques to bring pleasure to your partner as well. To erase the grind of each day and learn to make time for sex with passion – exploring and going deeper (pun intended) for the kind of sex you will refuse to blow off.
“He ripped my shirt off, pushing me up against the wall, grabbing my tits with his hands, his kiss fierce - his hands grab mine as he holds them up above my head - his cock is hard - I need him, I want him - he whispers have you been a good girl?”
Working in a strong sexual environment here at Secrets, I have the absolute pleasure of meeting the most amazing people and hearing their incredible journey of how they ended up at Secrets. The excitement, the fear, the unknown and how much they have expanded their way of thinking. We have had so many new people coming to check out a place where they are free from judgement and can really explore sex in a positive way. Being here is not for only one type of person or couple, it truly is for everyone that is looking to open their mind, experience something new or just connect with amazing people. We are not just about being swingers, we are a lifestyle resort, we explore our sexuality, we embrace what we learn and we strive to help others have a safe place to explore as well.